If I Could F#$& Seth MacFarlane, I’d Be Happy

Mr. MacFarlane is the perfect symbol of all my self loathing. I mean, there is no other person who has me split so perfectly. He’s handsome (ridiculously so) charming, talented and probably possessing other fine qualities known only to those who are close to him. On that level, I want him. On that level I like him. But then for almost those same exact reasons, I hate him just as passionately. He is so good looking. I think he was given more than his share in the looks department than he deserved and he is so charming and talented, he just skates around like the golden boy who can do no wrong. Even when he takes swipes of those who came before him and without whom he wouldn’t be enjoying the career he has profited from so greatly. People bend over backward to offer him everything they have. He cashes in millions at a time and there seems to be no end in sight for his success. I hate him for that.

What I hate most about that is I can’t blame luck on it either. I know he’s talented because I knew of him back when he was working under the Hanna Barbera banner. I know he’s worked hard and has earned his success. His rise has seemed to highlight my insecurities about myself. I’m not sure how old he is, but I’m willing to bet he’s younger than me and look where he is. I know it’s not healthy to compare yourself to others, but sometimes it’s hard to resist. You can’t help but think about what you’ve done with your life in the same amount of time as what someone else has accomplished with theirs. I can’t help but feel I missed something along the way. Some sign post on the road I didn’t see but now as I look back, I can see where to road forked, but I cannot see where that missed path would have taken me.

So, Mr. MacFarlane. If you read this. Come and get it.

What the…?

Okay. Must vent. I was just watching The Colbert Report and he spoke of something referred to as ‘dinosaur erotica’. For a second I thought he was joking, but then I dashed onto Amazon.com and checked and lo and behold, he was right. There are many books in this genre in fact. I’m not going to review them, as I will not read them, but much to my surprise, they are receiving praise. Mostly from people who think they’re a joke, which they might be, but they seem like they were written as real erotic novels, with dinosaurs.

What makes me mad is that these people are getting boatloads of orders for their books now because of this single moment in the spotlight. They crank out these short stories (19-20 pages per), sell them for 2.99 and now they’re laughing all the way to the bank, while I toil for months on one of my books and it’s like pulling teeth trying to publicize them and to get any sales. UUURRRGGGHHH!!! So is this the lesson? Write something so impossibly stupid no one will believe it’s real and you’ll succeed? It feels like at some point the whole world flipped over on its side and what I thought was true, hard work paying off and the rewards of effort, became false and now we reward those who put in the least amount of effort and work into their endeavors. Reality television rules the airwaves. The Kardashians don’t seem to be losing steam. People who generally choose the low, easy road win. It just feels like after every generation we dig ourselves deeper into this hole. We keep showing the generation after us that it’s best to take the shortcuts. Why work hard for years when you can have everything you want right now and all you have to do is betray everything you are? Until we start demanding better from the world, it’s only going to get worse. Keep in mind now we have television shows where you watch other people watching reality TV. You have shows where the content is just commenting on celebrities tweets about current events and other shows that just show videos from off the internet. If you think we can do better, then step up and let your voice be heard.

NEED FUNDERS NOW!!!

Hey,

It’s me again. We just got a lot of promo stuff up on FB and we’re getting a  good response, but we’re still far short of our goals. We need your help to get us there.

http://igg.me/p/541080

Just click on that link and donate something to the cause. Again, I must repeat, we are GIVING back some wonderful perks in exchange for the money. It’s kind of like buying original art. I hate begging like this, but frankly, this is only one of two things that were getting me through this year and if we don’t get our money, the dream dies. I won’t let that happen. If you don’t want to contribute, fine. Pass this link on to someone you know who might want to instead. Share this with anyone you can. I am imploring to you all. You all are my last chance because, shockingly my own friends have been stubbornly silent on this front. I apologize now for my bluntness in this, but I can’t help it. The pressure is on. Days, literally days are left before our campaign is up and we are so far behind, it’s not even funny. The bottom line is we need money and we need it fast. Click and share. Click and share. That’s all I’m asking.

http://igg.me/p/541080

Please and thank you.

Need Funders NOW!!!! Again

http://igg.me/p/541080

Hey! Just getting back on the fundraising trail today. We’re so close to our goals it’s crazy! Thanks to any who took the time to check out our campaign (links above and below) and double thanks to those who actually donated, Unfortunately, we need more and if you haven’t done so yet, look at our project and if you feel so inclined, make a contribution. Again, this is not simply giving money away. We are offering excellent perks to all level of donors. If you’ve ever wanted to take part in the production of a movie, now is your chance! Plus, depending on how well this short film goes, we may be going to a feature version and it could become big! I am imploring to you all out there to help. If you can’t contribute, maybe you could forward this link on to someone you know who would be interested. Pass it on and help us make this dream come true. So many people have put so much work into this already. I don’t want it all to be in vain. Please help!

http://igg.me/p/541080

Funders Needed NOW!!! pt 2

http://igg.me/p/541080

Okay. Starting to feel the pressure. Our deadline is just days away and we haven’t broken a thousand yet. In case you haven’t checked, I’d like to point out we’re offering a new perk now. A piece of original artwork. It looks really cool too, so if you’re into zombies you have to get onto our Indiegogo campaign and donate.

I really would like to achieve our goal. Not as much for myself but for the crew of people who have been working on this project since this past summer. They have really gotten into this and I know they are as excited about shooting this thing as I am. We’ve already put so much work into it, it would be a shame to fall short after coming so far.

So think about it. For the cost of a DVD, you can actually be part of the movie. You can have actually financed a film and own it. If you donate enough, you could even be IN the movie if you wanted. I implore again, follow the link above or below and check out our project and I hope after you do, you’ll be excited about being a part of it.

Thanks again

http://igg.me/p/541080

A New Low

I think Bravo has reached a new low in television. They now have a show called ‘The People’s Couch’ and I had only heard about it at first but today I had the sad misfortune to see a bit of it. Is this what we’re coming to now? A show where we watch other people watching reality television? Where did we go so far wrong?

I watch old shows from the past like ‘Friends’ and ‘Roseanne’ and ‘Fraiser’ and they still make me laugh. What happened? Why can’t we see shows like that anymore? It seems like the networks are telling the production companies to purposely water down their shows for some reason. It’s like they tell them to make bad shows in order to steer people toward reality TV shows. I don’t know. I just get depressed as I see the future of television becoming more bleak as the years go by. The shows are going down in quality and  the audiences are shrinking because of it. There are still talented people out there, but there’s something else holding them back. I have to admit even ‘Hot In Cleveland’ isn’t really all that good, at least not compared to a show like ‘Fraiser’ (which a lot of the production staff had come from before). There are a few genuine laughs and the actresses are highly appealing, but the wit and spark of the previous shows they had worked on is missing. I know they can pull it off, but for some reason it feels like they’re pulling their punches.  As if they are trying not to be too funny.

Remember when shows had theme songs? Remember when they ran the credits so you could actually read them? Maybe I’m just naïve, but I think the glory of the old days can be reclaimed, but we, the viewers, have to start demanding more from them. Don’t settle for another singing/dance competition show. Don’t watch a sitcom unless you really think it’s funny. Send a message that if you all in the biz want to keep pulling down those big paychecks, you’re all going to have to get back to work and earn them. I’m just sick of seeing people getting rewarded for taking the easy route, because clearly, quality suffers after too long.